To a Girl I Knew

To a Girl I Knew

I remembered you last night
Too distinct too cold for comfort
You initiated our all too brief friendship
Because I used to get so tongue tied
Even though I smiled a lot.

Pretty you are and always will be
My gracefully demure friend with a
Suitably picture book life,
How hard you made your face when you discovered
Mine simply wasn't that nice.

Do you know how it broke me?
For I had placed my faith in you,
Marked you out as a nice girl who won't abandon
A friend,
Because she made a mistake or two.

You wanted to banish and I was expelled
Blacklisted to desert terrains on the fringes,
Watching the ice creams you offered to
All the other little boys,
Except to my own little one, my friend.

Sigh....I wish I could just forget you
Such memories need an exorcist
Your heart was always aglow
upon your smiling face,
You charmed me and I couldn't resist.

The hope of befriending one who
wouldn't judge
And condemn on hear say alone,
But your life Mrs Vanilla Super fudge
Made mine seem dripping dreams
from its messed up crumply cone.

I remembered you last night again
For once again, sadly I had made a mess
But the tears from my eyes refused to rain
Because I recalled how when I confessed
To feeling pain,
It never failed to make me less.

With stony eyes and a maddening vice,
Iron tight and heavy, dumbwaiter heart
I surveyed hushed, a dull mute misery
The valiant walls of my vacant flat.

And my blessed friend from a
Far more happier place.
Thank God, for you will never have to know,
The effort and depth of that.

© Amrita Valan 2015